A Bad Apology is Worse Than No Apology
by Charity Errs
Summary: Although Lily Evans was acting perfectly normal, she was in fact very upset. Early that day she was in quiet a good mood. One could even go as far as to say that she was chipper. But that was before the incident at the lake.


**Warning:** This fanfic has an awful Serious/Sirius joke. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, it just sort of happened.

I own nothing. At all.

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Although Lily Evans was acting perfectly normal, she was in fact very upset. Early that day she was in quiet a good mood. One could even go as far as to say that she was chipper. But that was before the incident at the lake.

When analyzing the event, it is immediately obvious that the outcome would not be a happy one. She should've known that nothing good could come from her interfering, but she was only doing her job. Even if she really did want to help Severus, and she really did want to put Potter in his place. Potter, who was, of course, an arse. Severus was just as horrid in response, she just happened to be in his line of fire.

There are worse things he could've said. None that she could think of at the moment, but she was sure there was something much worse. It wouldn't have offended her as much if it was his first offense, but if she was being honest with herself, then she had to admit that lately he had been backsliding into the ways of the racist, pure-blood obsessed Slytherins that he had always avoided for her.

He hadn't even tried to apologize yet.

And Potter! Ugh, that patronizing, self-righteous, boorish, stupid arse! He had to start something with Severus, he just had to. There was absolutely no reason to at all! He had been sitting with his friends playing with that stupid snitch that he had stolen, being perfectly bearable. Playing with his hair like he always does, occasionally glancing her way.

Not that she had noticed, or anything.

Then without any warning, except of course that stupid smirk he always has, Potter started terrorizing poor Severus. She tried to stop him, but he came back with some ridiculous remark about how he would only let Severus go, if she would go out with him. That would never happen. And after a few more snide comments, Severus called her a mudblood. Honestly, why was she targeted? She was only trying to help. And now, much to the rest of the Gryffindors satisfaction, that friendship was officially over. He hadn't even apologized. And truthfully, if he did, she didn't know whether she'd forgive him or not. After all his behavior recently was less than appropriate, and he was hanging around people she'd rather not be associated with. But still and apology would make her feel better.

Now, Lily was sitting in the Gryffindor common room with her friends quietly celebrating the end of their O.W.L.s. The girls were celebrating around the fireplace, and although Lily was contemplating the end of her longest friendship and the contributing factors to its deterioration, she was acting perfectly normal.

Alice Prewett was not fooled. She knew her best friend better than anyone, save for perhaps James Potter. She could tell that although Lily was acting perfectly normal, she was in fact very upset.

"Lily," she whispered, "if you're not feeling up to celebrating – "

"I'm fine," Lily mumbled back, "Perfectly fine."

After seeing Alice's unsatisfied look, she added, "I would probably be _more _fine, if I had gotten an apology, but I'm okay, really."

Before Alice had a chance to question her further, the portrait swung open and James Potter walked in with his little gang.

The reaction was immediate; the common room went quiet, many of the younger children fled to their dormitories, and several seventh years began whispering excitedly about a bet they had made concerning the amusing young fifth year's next fight. Lily scowled in James's general direction, and he quickly began studying his shoes.

After a few moments of whispered coaxing by the other Marauders, James slowly began making his way toward Lily. He was not acting like his usual self. While he was walking over his eyes were looking firmly at the ground, his feet were dragging, and his shoulders were slumped. He stopped directly in front of Lily, and took a deep breath.

"Umm... Hi."

The look she gave him was more than a little intimidating, and he glanced nervously back toward his friends. He was met with an encouraging nod from Remus, an uneasy smile from Peter, and Sirius, on his knees praying.

He cleared his throat and started, "So, you and that git Snivellu– "

Remus began coughing violently.

He hastily reiterated, "I mean, you and Severus."

After waiting a moment, he reasoned, "You're pretty much done, with it? I mean, that. Err... Him?"

She looked him up and down, and replied, "Yes, I suppose."

He exhaled loudly and looked back to his posse again, this time to see them all nodding in support. His hand instinctively went to his hair, and upon looking back at Lily, he brought it back down quick as lightning.

After he stood there stupidly for a moment, Remus whispered loudly across the room, "James, your back pocket."

"Oh, right!"

He pulled out a wrinkled piece of parchment from his back pocket, and began unfolding it. It was extremely long, at least two feet, and all in James' handwriting. But Lily saw that most of the sentences had been scratched out, so there were only a few left at the bottom.

James cleared his throat again, inhaled deeply and read, "It should be no surprise that I am more than relieved that you are no longer engaging in any sort of relationship, platonic or otherwise, with a certain slimy haired git."

Remus groaned and covered his eyes.

"Although I never approved of your relationship with said Slytherin, it has been brought to my attention that I was possibly, partly responsible for the argument that took place today by the lake."

Sirius flashed him a smile and a thumbs up, while Peter looked crestfallen and Remus was shaking his head pitifully.

James continued, "I realize that my actions could be interpreted as an instigation of the aforementioned fight. However, I never meant to be the source of any grief you may be experiencing, and I am remorseful for any distress that my actions today may have caused you."

He looked up at Lily and nodded in finality. Everyone in the common room looked as if they had been confounded. While they all recovered from the shock of his speech, Alice Prewett broke the silence by asking, "James, what the bloody hell are you saying?"

He stuttered, embarrassed, while glancing shyly from Lily, to Alice, down to his paper then back at Lily again.

"Oh. I'm, uh, I'm saying that, I'm – well – I'm sorry."

Lily didn't get the joke. No one else was laughing either. She inquired suspiciously, "Are you serious? Or is this some stupid joke?"

"He's not Sirius, I – oomph"

Sirius was tackled and brought to the floor by Remus and Peter.

James ignored the awkward tussle and restated, "I'm sorry. Really, I am."

It was strange. The tone of his voice, the sorrow in his eyes. He seemed sincere, which was something Lily had never thought of James as before. And no one was laughing.

"You're sorry?"

She didn't want to believe it. Of course, she had wanted an apology, but she was hoping it would come from Severus! She didn't want to have to forgive Potter. And it wasn't even a good apology. What had he said, that he was 'possibly, partly responsible'? The whole thing was his fault! It was absolutely ridiculous. She was most certainly not going to forgive him.

"Lily... please don't hate me for this. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Okay. He was being rather sweet about the whole thing. And although it wasn't the best apology ever, at least he did recognize that he had done something wrong, right? He was trying. That was something that he rarely ever did. Plus he did look rather adorable when he was all nervous and apologizing to her. Wait, what? No. He wasn't adorable. James Potter was never adorable. He was just... more tolerable. Tolerable was the word, not adorable. They rhyme so they are easy to mix up.

"Lily, please. Forgive me."

That was so cute, he said please. She should give him something. What do they call it when you reward someone for doing something right? Positive reinforcement. That's it. She was just practicing positive reinforcement.

"I'll think about it," she responded.

It was an idiotic thing to say, because it seemed to re-inflate his stupid head. He immediately stood up straighter, and got that stupid grin back on his stupid face. And he had to run his stupid hands through his stupid hair like he knows she hates, and he had to open his stupid mouth and say those stupid, stupid words, "Well, you know, if you forgive me, there's a trip to Hogsmeade next weekend, and we could – "

"No!"

He did not just try and ask her out. That's the most ridiculous, stupid thing he could have ever done. Now, the entire common room was laughing. At her, by the way, not him. They were laughing at her. Because every other person in the world would have known not to give James Potter even the slightest bit of hope in this situation, and she was the one girl who was thick enough to give him some.

He didn't even look dejected, like any normal boy would after being shot down in front of many of his classmates. He was actually smiling, not just at his friends, but at the other boys, and, worse, the other girls! Was he actually flirting? That was just too much.

"No to Hogsmeade, and no I do not, and will not ever, forgive you! You stupid, boorish, insufferable arse!"

She hurriedly collected her things, and stormed up the stairs toward her dorm.

"Oh, Lily. Lily, come on! I was only joking."

He was still talking. What an idiot. What an absolute troll. She hated him! Despised him! More than before! She would sooner forgive Severus than James, and he hadn't even tried to apologize. She threw all her strength into slamming the door as hard as possible. It may have been a little melodramatic, but she couldn't stop herself. He just made her so angry!

Lily could still here him calling her name from downstairs.

She threw her things into her trunk, and began pacing. Her mother always paced. This was what he did to her. He made her act like her mother! She flung herself onto her bed, and screamed into a pillow.

The dormitory door opened and shut, and she felt her bed sink slightly on the left side. Soon enough she felt Alice's fingers running soothingly through her hair. It would've been relaxing, had she not heard James' yelling in the background.

"Lily, I'm sorry! It was a joke!"

Then she heard Sirius' voice advising, "Maybe, you should've let Remus write the apology, like he suggested."

Her bed began to shake and she heard Alice's muffled laughs. She turned to confront the traitor, and saw her falling off the bed in hysterics. Alice struggled to get a few words out between giggles.

"Well, you said you'd feel better after and apology."

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Alright, so what do you think? It is not my best work, but I felt like I owe you something since I haven't posted part 2 of Bad Idea yet. It is coming, I swear! With a full explanation as to why it has taken so long. I hope this has helped sooth your anger with me for now.

I know I don't deserve it, but I would really appreciate some reviews.

Please! Review, it's for **Charity**!


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